Life lessons

As you all are aware I am a very strong person and not much gets me down and when I'm down I bounce back up at carry on (at least that's what I think you guys think about me, I could be completely wrong). I've been thinking alot since this miscarriage. Not about the miscarriage persay, but all my life events up until now.
I feel I have been through hell and back over the past 10 years of my life. But my friends make me feel a whole lot better by telling me "I was so worried you weren't going to learn something from this situation". and that makes me feel better cause I was hoping I wasn't joking myself and that I have learned things.
The biggest lesson I learned was from my past relationship with "you know who" and how I was not going to be treated in my next relationship (which happened to be Phil). To this day I don't think people know the abuse I had to endure and I saw things and went through things people should never have had to deal with ever. Which sucks because those images are forever going to be in my head. I think you guys know what I'm talking about? This isn't a pity blog, I've just been thinking a lot lately. I just for once would like something to go smooth and easy in my life. It's incredibly frustrating. As I sit here and write this blog, I impatiently await trying for another baby again. I can't do that right away until for another month. So I guess I will just sit back and let life take me where it wants to go (eventhough it's incredibly hard). This is too deep, even for me ha ha ha. But I am having a moment. I'll have to write about something funny next time I log in.

Life

Well it's been a pretty rough couple of days. In and out of hospital and dr's office. But all in all, life must go on. I do not wish what I went through on my worstest enemy. The physical pain alone is a killer. Emotionally I am fine because unlike some, I know the true meaning of a miscarriage and why it happens and how often it actually happens. What most people don't know is that it happens to every woman 1 in 4 pregnancies. The percentage could be higher because some women don't even know they've had one because they don't know they are even preggers.
My brother says at least Phil and I know we can get pregnant and it will happen when the time is right. My brother has a friend who has been trying for a year and no baby/pregnancy yet. I feel bad for that friend. But Tom is right, at least we know we can have children and there are no problems (that we know of, let's hope we don't have a second miscarriage, then we will have to go for testing or something). One thing I learned from this pregancy is that my blood type is A- which means if I ever am pregnant with a baby who has + blood, my body needs antibodies put in it so it doesn't reject the fetus or I give birth to a "blue baby".
I'll tell you what hurts the most, the disappointment everybody else feels. Me? I'm strong and will get through this. Everybody else is what weakens me. Some might say I have a soft heart but a strong hard head. But the next pregnancy will bring just as much joy to everyone and like Jack said, "imagine the excitment when that baby is actually born".
I'll keep you all posted and just know as soon as it's ok to try again, Phil is all over it! ha ha ha, he really wants to try again, so do I. I don't think he realized how exciting it was until it was too late. He's sad and ready to try the minute we can.
And thanks to everyone for their kind words and their concerns. I never knew so many people cared about us. Thanks guys! Love you lots.